14.04.2022 - To live a humble life

#life

Today, I can’t quite seem to focus, so maybe writing things down will help. It’s the last day before my time off for Easter, and I’m wrapping up the week. Most of my work got done earlier in the week, but one important project is still sitting on my desk, delayed and pressing. I need to finish it before tomorrow, no matter what.

What’s getting me down, though, isn’t just the workload. It’s the success of someone I know—an acquaintance. This time, I’m not ashamed to admit that someone else’s success has me feeling a bit low, and I think I have a reason for it.

I stopped sharing my own accomplishments on social media over five years ago. The last time I proudly posted something was in the summer of 2016. Soon after, I moved to Germany and started to lead a quieter life. The lifestyle here, along with the humility I’ve seen in people around me, felt right for me. Watching my mother and older sister—who have earned respect and admiration without showing off—only solidified my decision to step back from self-promotion.

But over the years, I’ve seen others consistently humble-bragging and showcasing their wins online. Even though I no longer participate in that world, I can’t say I’m always unbothered. There are moments of discomfort, but none have stung quite like this.

I helped this person sincerely, and now I’m left wondering if I should call what she did plagiarism. She copied that idea from my application and is toasting today for her success without shame. Maybe the scholarship reviewers overlooked it, but I hope that if she tries to officially register her topic under the same department, someone will catch it. It is simply because in science, and especially in academia, such things are not acceptable. 

I don’t want to discredit her hard work—it’s clear she put in the effort to earn the scholarship. But there’s a line: she deserves recognition for what she’s done, not for what she’s borrowed from someone else. That is shameless! 

In a few days, I’ll move on, and hopefully, I’ll settle back into my quieter, humbler rhythm. They say that as soon as you start thinking about your humility, it vanishes. So maybe I’ve lost a bit of it in writing this. I’m still not sure what drives my choice to live a modest life—whether it’s a desire to quietly achieve or an acknowledgment of my own limits. But either way, I know I’m content with taking only what’s truly mine and focusing on my path. 

Sometimes, what others do may send ripples through my life, stirring the waters. Some waves might reach my calm shore, but they’ll eventually fade away, leaving peace in their wake.

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15.04.2022: I am glad that I wrote my thoughts out. Today I've been busy my mind with other things that I didn't even think about what bothered me yesterday. I believe it has been going the right way. Keep it up, Le!